How Many Scares Does it Take? And Why Aren’t I More Worried?

 

Since I’ve never had to use a Glucagon, I’ve never been good about remembering to get a new one once the old one expires.  Thank God they always expire instead of get used but still…

Last night, I caught a stomach virus that’s been going around.  I started feeling really awful around 8:30pm and just laid down on the bed.  I don’t know if I ever fell asleep but I do know that at some point I felt low but, couldn’t move or hardly talk.  Luckily, my husband was in the room and noticed I was trying to say something.  I was able to mutter the word, “low” and he took off for some juice.  He sat me up in bed and put the bottle of orange juice up to my mouth.  I downed two bottles.  A little later he tested my sugar which was 47.   Then an hour later my sugar was 52 and I started feeling nauseated and thought I might throw up.  Well, I did-plenty of times.  30 minutes later I was 44.  I downed lots of sugar even though I thought it was just going to come right back up.  I was beginning to have a major headache from the lack of glucose in my brain.  30 minutes later I was 42! 

I started getting scared.  I had downed all the juice in the house and had begun drinking several cups of sugar water (not appealing to a nauseated stomach).

I called my parents and my dad showed up around midnight with jello, crackers, juice, and most importantly, a glucagon.

Why didn’t I ever have one ready? 

Luckily I never threw up again and my blood sugar stabilized at 80, but I did get welcomed with blood sugars over 250 and 300 in the early AM hours.  Yay, isn’t it wonderful to bounce from one extreme to the other?

This made me realize (and so did my insistent mother) that I don’t have an emergency kit.  I’ve written about it and I myself don’t have one?  So anyway, here is what I will assemble as soon as I’m able:

Juice

Glucose tabs

Glucagon

Glucose gel

Crackers

Ketone strips

And as my mom thoughtfully pointed out, this kit should never be used except for emergencies.  That way, when there is an emergency you don’t say, “Uh oh, I’ve already drank my kit’s juice supply”.

Anyway, Is there anything I’m missing?  Let me know, I want to be prepared next time!

You know, this being Diabetes Awareness Month… I know a lot of non-diabetic people who have had a least one near death experience.  They tell the story at dinner tables, parties, and reunions.  They write about it in their journals and memoirs.  It’s a big deal.

We diabetics probably can’t keep up with our near death experiences.  There may be too many!  I mean, I can tell you at least 10 different times I came close to the worst case scenario but, it’s not even a big deal to me anymore.  Ok, it is, but, I’m kind of jaded.  Like, when I get scared after an incident like this and I think, Man! I could have died…I turn around and realize I’m not the least bit frightened or anxious about it the very next day. 

It’s like my way of life, my “normal”.  You know how some people who grow up in violent places are numb to violence?  Sometimes I feel numb to fear about my diabetes.  Maybe that’s just me.  Maybe I’ve just accepted everything I know which could go wrong.  Maybe I’ve got bucket loads of faith that I’ll be alright.  Maybe I’ve simply gone too long without a super frightening experience.  It’s true that I haven’t ever gone unconscious or had a glucagon shot or been in the hospital with ketoacidosis.

Here’s something I found just plain sad last night.  My husband looked at me when I was 42 and not able to drink more juice and said, “Do you want to make a trip to the hospital?”

Without thinking twice I looked up at him like a child that could never tell a lie and said, “No, they’ll kill me!”

So we’ve got some fear and trust issues eh?

All in a day’s life with diabetes. 

Just another one of the million reasons we need a cure.  No one should accept the faintest possibility of death with so much calm.

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