Category Archives: Uncategorized

I Passed Out and Ironically, Diabetes Was Not to Blame

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Thanks to my numerous allergies, I sometimes get laryngospasms which is where my throat closes up due to larynx muscle spasms. It only lasts a minute or two but it scares me to death each time it’s happened because when it happens I can’t breathe or talk.

Well, Sunday, yours truly, the occasional idiot, ate some blue cheese, which I seem to be allergic to (the mold in it or it’s relation to penicillin?)  Anyway, since eating blue cheese just causes me a sore throat, I didn’t think it was a big deal.  So I enjoyed some and figured I’d just enjoy my temporary hoarse voice for a few days.

Yesterday, I was in the living room with the kids when I took a sip of water and my throat suddenly closed up.  Within a minute I was on my knees struggling just to get a little bit of air.  Usually by 90 seconds I’m done and starting to suck in a tiny bit of air but this time I could feel myself getting really weak.  My head felt like it was swelling, my lungs felt like a major bruise, and next thing I know, I was waking up.

I got up slowly, relieved to be alive and then quickly searched the room for my kids.  They do so many crazy things that I felt myself blurting out “Oh thank God!” to find them sitting on the couch looking through books.  Little angels.  I had a bruise on my hip and I wondered if that was from falling over or my kids jumping on me (both are equally imaginable possibilities).  I looked at the clock and calculated that I was out about 20-30 minutes.  Why so long?  Did my body decide to take advantage of the opportunity and grab a quick nap?

The reason I was fine is because when you pass out from this, the muscles don’t spasm any longer.  At least that’s what my allergist told me.  So I really only fear this while driving or something like that.

I couldn’t help but go to sleep last night feeling so thankful and thinking about how lucky I was to pass out and type 1 diabetes not be the cause.   I wonder how many people who suffer from these spasms has that thought. lol.

The Other Health Issue That’s Always On My Mind

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The wonderful DOC isn’t my only online support group.  I also frequent support groups for people with food allergies.  I worry about my diabetes throughout the day as needed.  But since my daughter was 8 months old and diagnosed with strong peanut and egg allergies via skin and blood testing, diabetes has often been in the back of my mind.

I never wanted to be the crazy mom that wipes her children’s hands all the time when out in public.  I never intended to worry about another child holding my child’s hand.  I didn’t imagine I’d have to meticulously inspect every morsel of food before it passed my daughter’s lips.  I never imagined packing so much food every time we go out.  I thought our family would avoid restaurants in order to save money, not to save our child from getting sick.  And I thought we’d never go to fast food places because they are junk food rather than because they are unsafe.

Many trips out of our apartment result in some kind of itchy rash, despite the fact that she never eats what she is allergic to.  See, it’s not like I have to just avoid feeding her peanuts and eggs.  That part is easy.  I have to avoid her touching these foods, or touching someone who touched these foods, or touching a surface that someone touched who touched these foods, or even getting a kiss on the cheek from someone who had these foods earlier that day.  And do you know how many processed foods have peanut and eggs in them?  Or are manufactured on the same line as peanut and eggs?  Most processed foods.  I know, I’ve read all the labels and sadly placed the item back on the shelf.  Not because I wanted to purchase it, but because it’s one more item that is out in the world that adds to the threat.

The other day at the library a little boy pulls out a PB&J sandwich as he plays with the toys and books and I have to grab my kids, who are kicking and screaming (and about 35 pounds each) and leave.  I know they don’t understand so I can’t really explain.  I just have to keep them away.

Often, we’ll get home from a store and my daughter will be busy scratching frantically at her whole body.  There are noticeably red, raised rash welps.  She gets horrible diaper rashes every month that make her cry and scream in pain,  When she calms down, I look at her lovingly, trying to disguise my pain, and she just smiles.  And that smile makes me want to burst into tears.  I worry that when she’s older and aware of all she is missing out on, the baseball game, the birthday party, the library egg painting Easter party, snacks with friends, and the restaurants…I worry she won’t be smiling all the time the way she does now.  I worry she’ll go through something similar to what I went through.  Being diagnosed with type 1 as a child in the 90’s and using the older insulin, I had to live a very strict routine of diabetes management, meals, and snacks between the ages of 11 and 17.  And of course, I felt very different.  And of course, it’s hard on a kid.  It can be an empowering lesson and it was for me but I don’t want her to have to go through that.

Or her twin brother.  He’s had to live like her because of their constant contact with each other and he doesn’t have any food allergies. We’re all in this together as a family.  In fact, my mom is now a pro when it comes to cooking safely for us when we come over.  My dad replaced his beloved peanut butter with peanut free almond butter.  My family brushes their teeth and washes their hands and clean all the surfaces before we come over.  It’s our new normal.

This is a diabetes blog and so I have to say I’m incredibly thankful I’m writing about her food allergies as opposed to her having diabetes.  I am so thankful my kids don’t have diabetes.  I really want you to know that.  But, I am aware of how our lives have been impacted because of food allergies.  We’ve been scared to go places or see people as a result.  We’ve had to deal with people not understanding the severity of her situation in the least bit.  And because she was diagnosed at such a young age, there was no available epi pen for her weight range so we had to completely avoid scenarios where she might be exposed because we wouldn’t have an epi pen with which to give us enough time to make it to the hospital if an emergency situation came up.

So if you come across a “paranoid” or “overprotective” parent of a child with severe or life-threatening food allergies, please be kind and sensitive.  They don’t want to be that way but there is no other way to be when you love your child.  People do die from food allergies.  Those of you with diabetes or with children who have diabetes, I know you totally understand.

Thanks for listening.

Big Things in 2012 and Diabetes Interview Week

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Happy New Year!!!!

I hope you and your families and friends are doing great and feeling rested from the holiday season.

I’ve got to tell you, I’m so excited about 2012.  I feel like this year will bring some amazing new experiences.  In April I’ll be in D.C. as a judge/panelist representing WEGO health activists at a big conference.  Then in May I’ll be in Raleigh for the Diabetes Sisters Conference and so will Alex because he’s helping out with the first ever Diabetes Sisters Partner’s Perspective Program.  Women attending the conference can now bring along their partners, which I think is a fantastic idea!  In June, my kids will turn three years old  The older they get the more I feel like myself again (phew it’s about time).

This year I’ll be launching my health coaching business and I want to focus on women with diabetes.  I’ll also be actively pursuing publishers for my book.  I’ve been taking my time with that because of my kids being so young but now feels like the right time.  All this is almost enough to make me duck under the covers.  But if there is anything I’ve learned, it’s that we must do that which excites and scares us each day in order to actually gain anything worthwhile in life.  Starting this blog scared me senseless and took up every ounce of my free time and yet, thanks to all of you it’s been one of the most wonderful things I’ve ever done and has directed me to my purpose in life-to support people with diabetes.

So many people have inspired and helped me to recapture my health throughout the years and I want to serve others in that way.  That may mean sharing what I’ve learned or passing on a great tool I’ve heard about.  Or it may mean interviewing someone who inspired me or broadened my view in hopes they will do the same for you.  Speaking of interviews, this week will feature a few interviews that I think you’ll really enjoy.  I had so much fun talking to these people and learned so much.  Stay tuned for tomorrow and the rest of the week.

Cheers to you and your health.  Whether you know it or not, you’re already amazing and fabulous and only steps away from all the things you want in life.  If you don’t believe me, it’s ok, I’ll keep repeating myself until you do :)

Thanks for reading,

XOXO

D-Blog Day 2011

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The blog topic for this year is: Why you feel the Diabetes Online Community is so important? especially to you personally? Give examples of other diabetes involvement may you have, on or offline, how it helped you etc… How do you think “we” as an online community can band together to reach broader audiences to help even more people living with or affected by diabetes.

Diabetes is a disease that requires more management from the patient, than the doctor.  It would be impossible for me to call my doctor 15 times a day and have him help me make decisions on how and what to eat and how much insulin to give and when to give it.  I have to be able to do all that.  Because of this fact, diabetes puts an immense amount of responsibilities on the person who has it.  Out in the workforce, jobs with more responsibility typically pay more.  Diabetes doesn’t pay and it doesn’t necessarily play fair.  One can keep rather good diabetes control and still succumb to complications.

So due to all the above, a long term stress management solution and support system is in order.  One important aspect to that would be a community of people who listen to and support each other through their unique struggle.  The Diabetes Online Community gives people with diabetes a place to constantly connect and relate and get support and feedback.

For me personally, the DOC has been an amazing learning experience.  When other people share what works for them, I pay attention.  Every time I get feedback on a post, I am educated.  When others express different opinions, my mind is opened.  When it comes to my thirst to always learn more, the DOC is priceless and irreplaceable.

And then there are the people with diabetes I’ve had the pleasure to get to know.  It’s been so great to find friends who I can relate to AND who get what I’m going through.  I only wish we all lived closer to each other.  If computers died, I’d snail mail you all.

I think that we as an online community can reach more people by doing a lot of what we have been doing.  I think we need to walk the walk as much as possible.  We need to try and keep an open mind and avoid assumptions about each other.  We need to be bold and step out into our communities if we can.  Something I plan to do when my children are older is get involved offline and help those who are perhaps unable to get online much.  We can all do something to help, it just means recognizing our individual gifts and using them.  So many people in the DOC do just that, and it’s incredibly inspiring.

No D-Day 2011 Meme

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I know what you’re thinking.  Someone had a little too much fun with the photo editor.

Thanks to George at Ninjabetic for this idea!  To check out more No D Day Posts, click here!

For today I simply did a MEME, here goes:

  1. Do you wish upon stars? No, but I did as a child.  And I believed in Santa and the Easter Bunny for as long as I could.
  2. What color pants are you wearing?  Medium dark jeans
  3. What are you listening to right now? The Man Who Sold the World- Nirvana
  4. What was the last thing you ate? Blueberries
  5. If you were a crayon, what would you be?  Definitely Navy Blue.  
  6. How is the weather now? Don’t know…kinda cool, probably nice fall day.
  7. Favorite sport? Soccer, I used to eat, breathe, and dream it.  Still do sometimes…
  8. Do you wear contacts? Yes, gladly, seeing as the other day the optometrist took my glasses off, had me stare at the far wall and said, “Read the smallest line”.  That’s when I almost broke into tears and said through hard squinting, “I can’t see anything!”  She was like, “aww…here are your glasses back” lol
  9. Favorite month? I make this call based on the real events of the month therefore I can’t tell you until December 31st.  Strange, I know.
  10. What was the last movie you saw?  Happiness is a warm blanket, Charlie Brown.  Love it.
  11. What was your favorite toy as a child? I remember reallyyy liking my real microscope.  And I will always cherish the original Nintendo.  Even though my brother sold it.  I bought another and he sold that one, too.  Grrghh….
  12. How many states have you lived in? Technically 2 or 3…but mostly 1.
  13. Favorite Disney character?  Hello!?  I named my daughter, Aurora :)
  14. What are you most afraid of?  the unknown!  Oh my gosh if I could just see ahead, that’s all I ask!
  15. Tell us about an era of your life that you really miss.  I know most people don’t miss high school and yes there was much I really despised about it, but I sometimes really miss high school.  I SO enjoy learning in a classroom surrounded by peers.  You all know how opinionated I am and how nerdy so you can probably imagine this.
  16. Tell us about your favorite year when you were a student.  I was in 10th grade.  I was managing my sugars decently that year because I was not extremely depressed.  I made pretty good grades.  I had my friends in most every class.  Alex and I had gym class together.  I loved my teachers.  I played on the Varsity soccer team.  Life was good.
  17. When did you laugh today?  This morning, Henri ran into the wall.  Aurora couldn’t help but find it really funny but while she giggled she fell down and this caused Henri to laugh at her.  Then they laughed together for a few minutes while I chuckled from afar. 
  18. What do you care about that you wish more people would?  manners!
  19. Is it easier for you to go without food or go without sleep?  Food.  I cherish sleep.
  20. What non-alcohol beverage do you enjoy drinking the most?  I equally enjoy lots of drinks. Hot cocoa, fresh juice, coffee, milk.  I just don’t necessarily drink them very often.
  21. When you walk into a room full of strangers, generally how is your confidence?  It depends on who they are!  Generally my confidence could use a boost however I can fake it I think.
  22. Do you tend to believe members of the opposite sex mostly behave the same way?  Generally?  Although I have witnessed that you can give a 2 year old boy a doll and his 2 year old sister a truck and they WILL switch items every time!  Amazing…
  23. Would you ever consider being a vegetarian?  Sure, I’m not one of those whose body thrives off of animal protein.  I am a strong believer that some people need it.  Those who disagree should consider that they don’t need it and therefore can say that easier than someone with a different body.
  24. What alcoholic beverage do you enjoy drinking the most?   Scotch Whiskey
  25. Do you think someone might be thinking poorly about you? Why might that be?  Since forever people tend to think I’m one way when really I’m the opposite.  So I would say that someone out there probably thinks I’m an insensitive know it all who pretends to have all her ducks in a row.  Reality:  I’m actually a nice, sensitive person, who only jokes about knowing it all (there is a difference), who shares what works for her and admits to all her shortcomings quite regularly.  I’m even quite fond of self deprecating humor for goodness sakes.
  26. What was the last video you watched on YouTube?  Steve Jobs commencement address at Stanford University 2005.  GREAT STUFF.
  27. Is there something that you could never give up? My computer aka “The World at my fingertips”.
  28. Would you, (or did you) prefer a small, intimate wedding reception, or a big-scale, over-the-top reception?  My husband preferred something small and intimate.  I am not opposed to a grand over the top affair in my and someone else’s honor but was not willing to go in debt over it so we just had small and intimate.
  29. What’s bothering you right now?  My tea is cold :(
  30. What were you doing at 12 am last night? Chatting incessantly to Alex until he suddenly threw the covers over his head in desperation.  lol It was so funny.  I said, “Why didn’t you just say you wanted to go to sleep?”  I discovered he didn’t want to be mean and say “could you please stop talking now?” lol  Bravo honey, the covers move certainly sent me the message.
  31. Was this summer a good one? How warm was it where you live?  I’ve had better ones.  It was too hot and humid, yuck!
  32. Tell us the best thing about your current or most recent S/O.  What you see is what you get.  Is he smiling but secretly upset?  Nope.  Is he fake laughing?  Nope.  Is he full of flowery compliments each day?  Nope.  Does he promise me everything?  Nope.  But when he smiles, laughs, gives a compliment, and makes a promise, I know I can believe him.
  33. What is one of your quirks?  Hmm…when I’m upset I tend to always cut my own hair.  This often yields semi tragic results.  Why couldn’t I just clean when I’m upset like normal people?
  34. Best email ever:   Well the other day a woman emailed me saying she thought of me and Alex as a real life Princess and Prince.  She said it has nothing to do with money, fame, power, but grace, strength, and character and she thinks we have those things.  When Alex came home I had on a Halloween Tiara and said “Guess whaaat’s trueee?!”  LOL  It was very sweet though.  Very.

What the DOC is to Me

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So to start with I want to say I tremendously appreciate the connections, sharing, and activities having to do with the DOC.  I wish I had been able to experience this many years ago as a teenager.  I really do.  Since “connecting” with all of you I have learned countless of practical things.  I have learned lots in the realm of philosophy and have broadened my ideas having to do with diabetes.  I have felt more validated and whole.  I have also been tested and challenged as a result of coming into contact with so many different thoughts and opinions.  It’s all good, albeit sometimes complicated and twisty.

Relationships are challenging, we all know that.  They help us grow.  Growth isn’t easy but it’s very useful because it is assumed we become better human beings in the process and it also provides a sense of fulfillment in life. I think that growth is a big part of being human.

The DOC is like any other relationship.  Have you ever read something on a blog that inspired you to be a better person?  I have.  Have you ever read something on a blog that reached out and poured salt on a wound?   Was it on purpose?  Probably not.  Most likely, a vulnerable area was stirred in you and a challenge to face a truth or face a fear was moved in you and what you experienced was your reaction.

When these reactions happen to me I have tried to learn to think about them.  Instead of come to assumptions, I have to reflect first.  Why did something affect me so?  Why was I touchy or emotional?  Why did those words make me cry?  Why do I agree with someone?  Why do I disagree?  Where is that person coming from?

To me, the DOC is a relationship that is constantly encouraging me to grow.  This is often painful as much as it is exhilarating.  When it gets frustrating, I ask myself why something is having that affect on me.  When it is helpful, I’m simply appreciative.  When it’s overwhelming, I step back for a moment and get some air.  When I come back, the support from others reminds me what it’s all about.

So whether you lurk occasionally or hang out often, do what’s comfortable to you and know that your participation is priceless to others.  Remember that our differing opinions come from our differing circumstances and personalities.  Remember that differing opinions are a thing of value because they reflect a real way of thinking for other people and demonstrate courage to speak up.  This leads to discussions that lead to effective communication which leads to powerful community breakthroughs if people are humble, honest, sincere, and brave.

A powerful force for growth, change, and a better way of life for people with diabetes, that’s what the DOC is to me.

My First Encounter with Glucagon

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The Cleansing by Ana Morales

 

Ouch.  This post is going to hurt.

The last 2 weeks have been “epic” in the world of me and diabetes.  I haven’t struggled with highs like I have lately in the past 5 years or so.  I expect this kind of thing to happen from time to time so I’m not panicking, just trying to feel better soon so that I can get back to cleaning the house, working out, you know, living life.

Lately, to pull down a 300 I need about 10 units of insulin whereas normally, I need about 3 units.  So yesterday, I have a headache and decide to test.  I feel like my head is spinning so I squint to see what I’m doing.  I put the blood on the strip and wait for the countdown.  I see a 303.  Ugh.  I give 10 units of insulin (I really hate giving more than 5 units at a time because of the possibility of a crashing low) but I’m tired of the highs so I react.  Never “react” my friends.  Not with type 1 diabetes.  Anyway, I was also giving 10 units because I was going to eventually have dinner and this would also cover that.

Suddenly I can’t remember if I pulled out the strip or not but I notice the meter still looks on so I’m like, “huh?”  I suddenly feel instinctively told to test again.  I’m 99.  “Bah!”  I look at the vial of strips, “Code 303”.  Ugh.  Ok.  I go to Alex and tell him the silly mistake.  He says he’ll watch the kids and just to do what I need to do.  I notice there isn’t anything very high carb in the house, no juice.  I start chewing on some glucose tablets and he opens up the case of glucagon which I’ve never once had to use.  I’ve often been too high to be too low and during the last 5 years I rarely give more than 3 units of insulin at a time-which never puts me at risk for this kind of low, something I feel is a safe way to go…(retaking that note).

So Alex fixes up the glucagon and I go ahead and give myself the shot.  I use my own little needle because that sucker is scary!  Have you seen that thing?  It’s like an intramuscular needle.  Then I chew more glucose tablets and wait.  The kids are put down to sleep so luckily I have Alex with me now.  Two and a half hours later I’m 140 and I think I’ve avoided a really ugly situation when suddenly I feel extremely nauseated.  The sensation is strong enough that I’m crying in front of the toilet just like two nights ago.  I promise you all I’m not pregnant.  So something else is going on.  Anyway, after the nausea settles down I test again and find that I’m 61.  I feel so awful that I test again after five minutes and see a 45.  I can feel my blood sugar shooting down and I’m starting to sweat and tremble and feel dizzy.  Alex wants to call 911 but I think that they will just give me glucose and annoy me with their lack of type 1 knowledge and perhaps ask if I’m suicidal (wouldn’t be the first time).  Besides, I have another glucagon.  Even in my weakest moments I’m still “me”, aren’t you glad? :D

Instead I fight past the nausea while Alex forces me to sit up (really all I wanted to do was lie down and sleep) and he makes me eat glucose tablets which is hard at this point due to the low and the nausea.  I think I fought him for a while which has never happened before.  I’ve never been that kind of low.  I’ve had the kind that makes you cry but I’ve never yelled at my husband to leave me alone and let me “rest”.  He was probably thinking, “Rest?  Where, in heaven?”  I’ve heard people say that when they have a really bad low they become extremely difficult with those trying to help them.  I can now understand what they mean.  It’s like feeling very drunk.  Only worse.

Anyway, at this point I’m still calm in a sense.  I tell Alex to get his phone ready and to have the second glucagon ready just in case.  I think I see tears.  I take in about 12 more glucose tablets and test to see a 74.  It’s been three hours and my humalog is all up.  I’m so physically exhausted I lay on the bed much to Alex’s dismay as he fears I’m doing something other than sleeping.  I simply cannot move.  I can’t even open my eyes.  I tell him not to worry because as long as my blood sugar is ok, I’m not going to die.  He tests me every 15 minutes for a few hours and I go to bed at 1am with a 200.  This morning I wake up and test-and you gotta be kidding me, I’m 99 again.

3 Years

The sacrament is taking place and as the Priest holds up the wine goblet she daydreams. Of all places and times this is where she finds she thinks best. Not without guilt, however because this is a place where she knows she should really be paying attention. Its just that she felt exposed in church. Sometimes comfortably so, and she would ponder, relive, and dream up things in the middle of Mass. After all, no one could interrupt her there, and she was easily distracted. Yet, there were other times she felt scared to go, as if God would reveal to her, her latest sins. This was a place where she stripped down and self-examined and criticized.  Today she thought of how her disease was out of control, loneliness clutched her, but hope filled her heart.

Today, just as on many other Sundays, he glances across the room at her. “Amen.” She looks back, shamelessly, until her cheeks flush and a giggle squirms up out of her. Once he notices her reaction his confidence increases and the quiet boy with the dark hair and large, honest brown eyes looks over at her again. There is an expression on his face that to her says “I’m curious about you”- and nothing more. She does know as much: she is safe as long as he remains there. In her mid-teens that fact seemed extremely inexplicable.  The girl looks away again, giving her heart rate a chance to recover and then she focuses her gaze at the cross in front of her.

Three years pass.

In the same crowded room, the girl is standing next to her fiancé.  She feels confused, sorrowful, and nervous.  She doesn’t even know why.  Then, the same boy from before, from always, walks into the room.  As he walks by she feels like someone has ripped her heart from her chest.  She feels lightheaded and sways slightly.  Her breathing is labored and she looks down at the floor which seems to be spinning.  Why can’t she figure out what these symptoms mean?  What do these feelings mean?  They’re not clear and she isn’t able to make sense of anything.  The boy with the brown eyes glances at her and she glances back.  An overwhelming feeling takes over and a realization hits her.  One that would have been helpful to have had years ago.  She literally has to stop herself from running to him.  The girl would later describe this seemingly insignificant moment as one of the happiest in her entire life.  She finally knew.

A few more years pass.

The Priest holds up the wine goblet and the girl nods.  She is wrapped in layers of white satin and tulle, red Italian beads hanging from her neck.  She daydreams again about the quiet but noble boy she has known for so long.  She thinks it so very odd that the only longstanding logic she could apply to her decision to marry him was the simple yet overwhelming feeling that ever since they were kids, whenever she stood next to him, she felt at home.

 

Three years pass.

Happy Anniversary, Alex.

Earthquake or Low Blood Sugar?

Courtesy of Salvatore Vuono

So can we talk about it?

By “it” I mean the baby tremor that we had in Virginia which as you all know was felt over much of the East.  First off, I would like to point out that millions of people have bug phobias and fear of heights and so fear is fear is fear.  (So don’t judge my panic over this incident)  Also, according to CNN this was a long tremor.  My apartment shook for a good 15 seconds and trembled for a total of about 35 seconds.  AND the last time Virginia felt something like this, we were all industrial workers and dress wearing housewives (is that what we did in 1897?).  So, for most of us this was a new sensation.

I felt a short tremor about 5 years ago at work.  It lasted 3 or 4 seconds and was very subtle.  I thought it was fascinating.  Yesterday was different.  We live on the top floor of our brick apartment building and when it started I was sitting in the corner where the computer is stationed.  I was writing an email to someone about Vitamin D when suddenly my keyboard began trembling and without realizing it I typed “ahhh!” into the email.  I quickly hit “send” figuring that if I died, someone would have an account of my last words on this planet.  Sadly, I would have gone out a little less dignified than I would like.

Anyway, the trembling got stronger and stronger and then my jewelry box fell off the dresser.  At the wall to my right I heard these large snapping noises that sounded like planks of wood snapping in half.  I ran to the living room to open the door to the balcony to see if it was the wind (I don’t know, I was in an “anything’s apparently possible” state of mind).  There was a gentle breeze and the balcony felt like it was swaying.  “Am I low?”  I ran back inside and started to pick up a few books from the book shelf when two others fell on my head.  Then I looked over to the mantle and saw a few dvd’s tumble down.  Then I glanced at “killer” our fish whose small plastic container was dancing towards the edge of the counter.  I ran and pushed it back from the edge and then ran back to my bedroom and like a total ditz spun around in place about 3 times.  It finally dawned on me what was going on.  And then it was over.  All I could think about for the rest of the day was how the earth shook.  The earth, ya’ll.

My most pitiful thought in the middle of this was: “And I thought diabetes was going to be the one to do me in”.

It was kind of nice thinking otherwise for a few moments.  So, thank you, earthquake.

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